Valentine’s Day is Overrated

This year, forget the Hallmark cards. Forget the Russell Stover’s. Forget the roses, the teddy bears, the conversation hearts and all the other horrible pink and red commercialized Valentine’s Day accessories. Even if you did happen to find that special bae, Valentine’s day is still the worst. Here are the reasons why:

  1. You’re expected to give/eat overpriced chocolate and sugary treats for no reason. This is the time of year most people set and work towards fitness goals, and having a day full of sweets and treats right in the middle of the most depressing month of the year is doing no one’s beach bod any favors. shutterstock_46314703
  2. If you’re single, this holiday is a drag. There is always pressure to secure some type of date. Even though it’s completely ridiculous, if you don’t have a Valentine on Valentine’s day, you probably feel badly about it, something ingrained in you during those grade school days when your peers would fill your poorly decorated shoe box with impersonal greeting cards – signed your classmate. shutterstock_1127629844
  3. Is it just me, or has the price of greeting cards gone up astronomically?? However, if you don’t give a card to your Valentine, you’re seen as rude and thoughtless, so you spend the $10 on some glittery, pop-up, song-singing card that poorly articulates your feelings. Or even worse, the card that gushes feelings that you don’t actually feel, but feel obligated to say because its “the right thing to say”. Gross.shutterstock_529070848
  4. You’re expected to eat disgusting chalky candy with stupid sayings. Who needs their candy to tell them they are loved? Are we so insecure with ourselves that we have to print motivational sayings on our food to make us feel better? shutterstock_171277760
  5. You have overblown expectations for you/your Valentine and how AMAZING your night will be. Has anyone ever actually had a super fantastic Valentine’s Day?? That fairytale date straight out of Liam Hemsworth’s most recent rom-com is nowhere near the realm of reality. It’s not likely that you’ll experience perfectly timed eye contact, over a candlelight dinner with romantic background music while a supermodel professes their love for you. Sorry.shutterstock_794265550
  6. You have to wait FOREVER if you plan to go out to eat at a restaurant. Not to mention, it’s difficult to even get a reservation because everyone in the entire country is expected to go out to eat on this ONE day out of the year. Skip the crowd, a microwave dinner at home will be much more enjoyable on 2/14.shutterstock_207745513
  7. Hearts are a stupid shape. Not sure why this has become the symbol of love, but there is nothing I hate more than heart-shaped anything. It’s not symmetrical, it kind of looks like a person’s backside…there is nothing appealing about it. shutterstock_1011633751
  8. You either give or receive ugly jewelry that you spent a good amount of money on because, again, it was “the right thing to do”. shutterstock_1095488267
  9. No one looks good in pale pink in the winter, yet, on Valentine’s day it seems to be the wardrobe color of choice. Unless you live somewhere that actually gets sun year round, stick to your darker clothing options unless you want to look like a lifeless wash of skin tone fabric. shutterstock_1292659504
  10. Even though its the WORST weather of the entire year, you’re expected to dress up and wear something cute. You know what might be a better tradition? SWEATS DAY. I’d sure rather promote a day to be warm and comfortable in the middle of February, but I’m sure I’ll succumb to societal pressure and wear a dress that is a an unflattering color with tights that will allow me to freeze in shoes that will someday cause my feet permanent damage. Because LOVE.shutterstock_1302632617
  11. There is literally no significance to the date of February 14th. The origins of the day are unknown. There was a spring festival that the Romans celebrated…on the 15th. There is no tie to romance whatsoever. If it’s an anniversary of anything, it’s the massacre in Chicago. If we are going to spend a day encouraging romance, shouldn’t it be any time OTHER than the worst month of the year?shutterstock_606145460
  12. It’s the most jealous time of the year. It is literally just a competition to see who’s significant other went the most overboard for no reason, and when your partner didn’t win the competition you’re mad and jealous. Over nothing. This holiday doesn’t promote love, it destroys it.

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